Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
