But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
