I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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