how can u be prego again
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
