Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
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