He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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