Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Randomize
