no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
