dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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