do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
