Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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