so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
