the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
try to milk me bitch
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