I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize