I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
