brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
