last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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