the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
