I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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