Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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