names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
