be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
im holly from the hills drunk
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Randomize
