he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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