lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
