the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
