this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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