All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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