Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Randomize
