how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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