ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
