I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize