Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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