please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Randomize
