I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
