the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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