Banned from zoo.
Again?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
