she looked like the before picture.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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