PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
