fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
