You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I'm lost and stupid without you.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
