did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Just high enough for therapy.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
