i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
