I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
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