Me. At least after what I've been through.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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