let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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