I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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