There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
