First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
