I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
