I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
