I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize